Our Bunny Humor Page

 

DID YOU KNOW…

Humor in Dutch Rabbit Form

Did you know that the Dutch are one of the more popular breeds of rabbit?  

They are quite famous for the introduction of wooden shoes and of course windmills that are credited with blowing away the more primitive European Rabbit and opening the way for the domination by the far more clever Dutch settlements.

 

 

Did you know the Dutch are one of the oldest breeds of rabbits?The “Neanderthal Rabbit”, also known as the “Cave Rabbit” had a large brain capacity but failed to develop an appropriate deportment or appearance of the more genteel Dutch rabbit and instead is believed to have descended into a disgustingly primitive existence living primarily in caves and burrows. The Neanderthal Rabbit has never been considered the direct ancestor of the modern Dutch Rabbit due mainly to its total lack of sophistication and aristocratic bearing.  Instead it is the Jackrabbit that is considered the most direct descendent of the Neanderthal Rabbit along with its queer cousin the rare but rather well documented Jackalope that is rumored to inhabit the high Plaines and deserts of the Western United States

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Did you know that the Dutch are said to have originated in Holland, but didn’t find their way to England until 1864? 

It is believed this was due to the “Mad Dogs” that had so long inhabited the English countryside. 

 

Did you know that the Dutch are known for their markings, Blaze, Checks, Neck, Hairline, Saddle, Undercut, and Stops?

The Blaze represents the brightness of their superior intellect.  The Checks representing their tongue and check manner of humor.  The neck represents their Enthusiasm for exhibitions of highly romantic necking and overt displays of affection in public.  They’re crowning Hairline representing their long ancestry leading to their ascendancy into royal society as the true aristocrats of the European species of rabbit.  The Saddle represents their dominance over all other lesser species of mammals.  The undercut came to represent the unique ability of the Dutch to undermine and defeat even the most worthy of opponents.  And of course the stops have been credited with the familiar and popular Dutch saying; “The Buck Stops Here.”  This Saying is considered to have some relationship to the propensity of the Dutch to collect Doe.  A slang expression for money or other things having great redeeming value.

Did you know that not all Dutch have a hairline?  A rabbit without a hairline should not be disqualified.  The hairline has no points to it, but is very desirable by judges. 

 

However, the more aristocratic of the Dutch consider those Dutch without a hairline to be of lesser breeding and defiantly low brow and belonging to members of the Dutch proletariat.

 

Did you know that here in the United States, the Dutch are recognized in 6 different varieties: Black, Blue, Chocolate, Gray, Steel, and Tortoise?  

The Dutch being extremely tolerant of racial diversity have interrogated well and show pride in their heterogeneity by maintaining strict bloodlines of genetic purity; a characteristic that has gone a long way in developing the finest examples of their breed.  Though it is conceded that even these best efforts have been lost on a few. 

Did you know that in Europe they have 30 different varieties? 

Well, what else is to be expected?

Did you know that the varieties Blue, Gray, Blue Steel, Chinchilla, Gold Harlequin and others are in development here in the US? 

This development has encouraged many to argue for more strict immigration laws and a crack down on illegals.  Others are simply heard to say, “Well, there goes the neighborhood.”

 

Did you know that in the UK, their recognized varieties are: Black, Blue, Steel, Chocolate, Yellow, Brown Grey, Pale Grey, and Tortoise Shell? 

See above.

 

Did you know that the Dutch are a calm and laid back breed who love attention? 

Though calm and laid back may be a bit of a stretch they are however extraordinary exuberant lovers with a passionate side that is both enthusiastic and animated.  Characteristics that may help explain their relatively recent successful invasion of England.

 

Did you know that Markings are worth 50 points whereas type is only worth 25 points, yet type is still more important than are markings?  

 

This little bit of contradictory gibberish is a prime example of the superiority of the Dutch over their more primitive handlers.  The Dutch are noted for their straightforward approach to life that is fast to incorporate the kiss principal of “Keep it Simple Stupid.”

 

Did you know that The Dutch are one of the tougher breeds to breed?  Out of 5, you’re lucky if you get at least 1 or 2 that are showable. 

But then the Dutch have not been a breed that was overly pretentious or arrogant, flamboyant and a bit conceited, maybe.  After all, looks are only skin deep, but perfection goes all the way to the bone.

 

Did you know that you want to breed for body type, really rounded heads with short ears and straight legs?  

The Dutch have always been very particular about their appearance.  I did happen to check with a very well connected Black Dutch in my Rabbitry for a comment on this question and got the following response.No self-respecting, fashion conscious Dutch would ever go around town sprouting a pair of those ridiculous looking over grown floppy ears as seen on some of those silly looking flop eared dumbos.  And what twitterpated bun would ask for pretzel legs unless he was one of those crazy kids with the puffy hair hanging down below his butt.  And then that thing about a round head, just what shape is a head suppose to be if not round?”  The Dutch don’t prance around the bushes all day; they tend to get right down to the bottom of things fast and dirty.

Did you know that the Grays were called “Brown Gray” in the 1995-2000 standard, but were back to being “Grays” in the 2001-2005 standard? 

Most Dutch tend to believe in the carrot principal.  If it is orange, grows in the ground, is round and tapers down to a pointy end, and has a leafy top above ground then you probably have a carrot.  It doesn’t much matter what you call the thing; it will still pretty much look and taste like a carrot.  It kind of gets back to the KISS principal

 

Did you know that the English Spot and the Dutch are the only breeds that call the Chestnut variety “Gray?” 

For the Dutch, this statement only goes to support the contention that they are not opposed to granting that every once in a while some other bun can be equally as brilliant in coming up with a good idea.  But then bright ideas and an electrifying personality have just been kind of a natural characteristic for the Dutch.  They just keep going and going.

Did you know that the Dutch have normal fur, which is flyback, meaning that when you pet it backwards it flies right back into position. 

A condition that the Dutch believe only further goes to illustrate the exceptional quality of its breeding, not to mention their natural supremacy.  It is just always so hard to be humble when you are so very, very good.  

Did you know that many breeds have come from the Dutch

 Thus as the Dutch would say,   "all things worth while building must first begin from the highest quality materials."

 

Or as in an Old Dutch saying,  “when you’re good you’re just so very good.”

John W. Jones

Copyright October 2005 All rights reserved

Verlannahill Rabbitry